Photograph past Jason Rosewell

Listen With the Intent to Empathize

Dainon Haggard

Dainon Haggard

Senior Strategic Enterprise Client Business relationship Director at Microsoft

Published Oct 31, 2017

Stephen R. Covey said, "About people do not listen with the intent to sympathise; they heed with the intent to answer." (The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People) Why is that? Why is it easier to heed with the intent to reply, than information technology is to endeavor and understand what is really backside the words being shared with us?

Part of the reason why I believe is that information technology is easier to brush someone bated with a quick canned response than to dig in and sympathize. In the United States, we'll oftentimes ask other, "how are you doing today?" Nigh often the response is brief, merely untrue, as in the words, "I'g good," when they really aren't doing that well. And we move on our way.

I lived in Ukraine for 2 years. I learned the Russian language, ate Ukrainian food, adopted Ukrainian traditions, and actually felt like I was one of them. My sole purpose of existence there was to serve the Ukrainian people. I wanted to help them to be happy. It was very eye-opening when I discovered that when I asked a Ukrainian on the street how they were doing, it started a 30 or lx-minute chat. They truly shared with me what their struggles and successes were. They described how a family member was ill, or so-and-then wasn't being paid past their employer, or how they weren't feeling well. They were very honest and frank in all of their discussions.

This definitely isn't custom throughout the world. And then how do we listen with the intent to empathize?

  1. Ask more questions. Dig in. Seek clarification on what they are expressing. Echo what yous have heard, and ask if yous understand what has been shared correctly.
  2. Cease yourself from interrupting the private who is speaking.
  3. Avoid distractions. If you lot are talking with someone face-to-face, put downwardly your phone, close your laptop, eliminate anything that might pull your attention abroad.
  4. Don't assume yous know the answer to everything. No one likes a know-it-all. Information technology'southward OK to admit that you lot don't know how to solve their concerns, but that you are willing to help.

We alive in a world that could profoundly benefit from improved conversations. Seek to understand, rather than to answer.

If you would similar to learn more than nigh e-mail prospecting techniques, you can download my Email #Prospecting Success ebook here in exchange for subscribing to my Tips and Tricks Newsletter. Don't worry, I won't' SPAM you, and I won't sell your data.

#HuntersAndClosers #Sales #Marketing #Listen #Understand #Discovery #Covey

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